With faith, perseverance, and the support of the Mission, Hayden has found stability – and a home he can share with his tamariki.
“In 2019, I had fallen into a pretty bad drug addiction. I lost my job and started living between a tent and my car at different beaches around Wellington. Being homeless was my last resort, but I had pushed my family away with all of the drama in my life. I had two sons who were living with their mum in Auckland. It was an ugly time in my life, and I was definitely lost.”
After about a year, I Googled ‘homeless shelter’, and came across the Mission for the first time. I imagined a place for homeless people would be like what you see in the movies. But when I visited for an interview, the staff made me feel very welcome, and when I saw my room I couldn’t believe it. That day, after being sceptical about my faith for a long time, I dropped to my knees and thanked God.”
Once I moved in, the staff spent time checking in with me, and that made me feel loved, which was kind of what I needed. It was hard for me to talk about my addiction and family issues, but I started joining the men’s group every morning, where we shared what we were all going through. I liked surrounding myself with positive people while I was breaking my drug addiction, and the whole experience was very motivating for me. I didn’t want to go back to my old life, and from there I picked myself up.”
The next few years were better. I left the Mission and stayed away from drugs, but I still couldn’t find my feet, and I ended up coming back for help. I moved into Te Pā Pori on Tory Street and found a full-time job as a scaffolder in Waikanae, where I later became a team leader. It was awesome how much help there was at Te Pā Pori, and whenever I got days off I would join the activities and groups. It was good being around people who had been through similar situations, and knowing that I wasn’t the only one having a hard time. Being there gave me a big boost, and I created a stable lifestyle for the first time in years.”
All through my time there I was going to heaps of flat viewings, but never getting accepted. Because they do credit checks, and mine’s been so bad for the last ten years, I couldn’t get anything. I also missed seeing my boys and wanted them near me, but as they couldn’t stay at Te Pā Pori with me, my sister agreed they could stay down here in Wellington with her.”
Since then, I’ve been able to build a proper relationship with them, and that has been a blessing. And thankfully, with the Mission’s support, in November last year I was also able to move into Te Ō – which is my own rental apartment. When I first saw it, I was overwhelmed. I was so happy, because it’d been six long years since I had somewhere I could call home. Now my kids come and stay with me every weekend and in the school holidays.”
I do still have some hard times ahead of me, mainly because in May, after nearly five years, I lost my scaffolding job. I’ve been to lots of interviews, but construction’s pretty slow at the moment, so I’m grateful that the Mission’s here helping me get through it all. I’ve been going to the Social Supermarket on those stressful weeks when I have to pay my bigger bills and wouldn’t be able to pay for food. The last couple of Christmases, I’ve also been invited to the Mission Toy Store. That was a first-time experience for me as a dad, because even though I was working, I couldn’t do much for my kids at Christmas. I loved that I could choose my presents for them, and it also made me wish that I could get into a position to do that for them on my own.”
The last six years have been a heck of a journey, and the only sense of stability I’ve had has come from the Mission. It’s given me a place to live, helped with food, and let me give presents to my children at Christmas. Personally, I’ve changed a lot too. I’m back at church, I’ve been sober for four years, and I’m being a better dad for my kids.”
If I could bring together all the people who have helped get to this point in one room, I would do one big thank you speech! I never thought there was help out there for someone like me. Without you, I don’t want to imagine where I would be.”
